


Bokoblins

by queenofliterature



Series: Tumblr Requests [8]
Category: Linked Universe - Fandom, The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
Genre: Gen, Swearing, That mask, Wild pretends to be a bokoblin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-23
Updated: 2020-07-23
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:42:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25461871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queenofliterature/pseuds/queenofliterature
Summary: Upon coming across a group of particularly nasty monsters, Wild uses a very practical item.
Relationships: Four & Hyrule & Legend & Sky & Time & Twilight & Warriors & Wild & Wind (Linked Universe), Hyrule & Wild (Linked Universe)
Series: Tumblr Requests [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1757350
Comments: 20
Kudos: 441





	Bokoblins

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you @eldritchsteamhearted for this request "I have a request. So, the Links are having difficulties scouting out a monster camp, so Wild offers to put on one of his Kilton masks to check it out. But when he puts on the mask, the others get really wigged out, because Wild is freakishly good at acting like a monster, and tere is some deep uncanny valley effect to seeing their friend lumbering around and growling and easily blending in with the monsters" I had so much fun writing this! thank you for the request.
> 
> This turned out with a lot more crack than I intended. I also need you guys to know that for half the fic I spelled Bokoblins as Bobokolobkins and saw nothing wrong. Also I’ll say it once and I’ll say it again. Wild is absolutely a science nerd just like Zelda. Did you see his interest towards the slate when Zelda was explaining the frogs? They absolutely bond over being scholarly science nerds who love exploring. Thank you for the request! I hope you enjoy it! Also for those that don’t know, the Uncanny Valley Effect is basically something that is almost human but not quite, which our brain rejects but is also horrifyingly hypnotized by. “
> 
> In aesthetics, the uncanny valley is a hypothesized relationship between the degree of an object's resemblance to a human being and the emotional response to such an object” (Wikipedia)
> 
> Ever seen that horrifying teddy bear with human teeth? That’s an example of it.

Golden Bokoblins were far smarter than the others. Wild didn’t know what caused them to start showing up, but there were more of them the more he returned to his Hyrule. Perhaps Ganon had created them when he noticed Wild had conquered the Divine Beasts. Whatever they were, they were far more intelligent than even the dangerous silver and black species. Which was honestly fascinating. The Compendium gave Wild basic information such as the parts he could collect from them and their intelligence combined with being influenced by Ganon’s magic. 

The Compendium was useful and Wild loved reading all of the entries he had collected, but he loved discovering facts for himself even more. He could never stay for long with Zelda fighting Ganon off all on her own, but on days he was injured or had been up for days on end, it was nice to put on Kilton’s mask and observe how the Bokoblins would act, among other monsters. 

When he wore the mask and approached, they always cautiously sniffed at him, heads cocking like a curious dog. It always made Link wonder if that meant Bokoblins formed packs for life. What if he were really a new Bokoblin who lumbered out of the woods? Would they accept him eventually? Or were Bokoblins formed purely with Ganon’s magic in a group that didn’t break. That was almost a nice thought. To be born into a group that you were surrounded by until death. 

Wild was so innately curious about the packs monsters formed. Were they born with the knowledge of who their groups were, and who were marked as alphas? The silver and gold Bokoblins had markings and bright colors that perhaps showed through biology who were the more naturally superior of the group. Perhaps they instead showed dominance through fights and hunts they achieved, but that was less likely. Wild rarely saw infighting between the camps he would stalk at night. He could ask Kilton, but that would be far less interesting. Besides, Kilton only seemed interested in talking business with Wild.

The circle of life within monster packs was fascinating. Bokoblins seemed to listen to the next higher rank, along with the other monsters such as Moblins. Lizalfos seemed pretty neutral, having a whole other culture of their own being from the water. The Bokoblins were energetic, the higher ranks leading the red ones in odd dances around the fire, fists pumping and continuous grunts crying from their mouths. Wild had tried to copy it once, but even then they were still suspicious of him, especially the brighter ones. 

Once Wild tried to blend into a large monster camp within a skull. 4 red, 5 blues, 2 black, 2 silver, and 1 golden leader. It was going fine until a Keese had attacked him from above, causing the leaders to rain violence over his head. After that, Wild knew he would need to increase his acting skills. He spent nights filled with nightmares watching and learning instead. He was never one to sulk and feel sorry for himself, even when he felt unworthy of his title of hero and woke to clothes soaked with sweat and tears, the only time he would ever cry was in his sleep. He would move on and do something productive instead. Studying monsters for their behavior patterns helped him in the long run. Besides, at the time the only thing he remembered of Zelda was how knowledgeable she seemed. Maybe they could research together when this was all over!

Every monster was a creature of habit. Guarding their area (Wild still wanted to know how they communicated what they were guarding), everyday until they went to bed at approximately 11 pm. Everytime they would simply collapse and start snoring instantly. Wild had learned how they moved and what made them tick. The masks from Kilton only enhanced his research. Soon he was able to blend in, even with the golden ones lurking about. They were still suspicious, but Wild was able to steal their weapons in the night and slay them without even alerting the creatures of a traitor in their midst. 

That’s how he got many close up pictures of his enemies. Although the group he was traveling with didn’t need to know that. They thought he took those in the middle of deadly fights. Although he did do that sometimes, that was only half the truth. It was hilarious to see the older ones panic though so Wild let them believe whatever they wanted. 

The behavioral science of monsters aside, it seemed Wild’s gifts were needed.

His group of friends were looking upon a rather large group of monsters stumbling and grunting around the campfire. Almost all of them were golden. Wild had never seen this before, it must have been because of the very infection he was fighting among other Hyrules. Wild felt anger rise at the infection still spreading across his Hyrule. Zelda shouldn’t have to deal with this, not after a century of fighting off Ganon. He would be sure to take care of it before it caused her too much strife. 

The group started signing strategies to each other from behind their hiding place, large bushes that hid them well enough from the monsters only meters away. Signing was easier than trying to whisper in low voices, especially with nine links all having opinions on how to fight the monsters Wild claimed were the most powerful in each species in his Hyrule. 

Wild knew the group would have a hard time defeating this many golden Bokoblins. Sure they could do it. The other Links were immensely powerful and talented in fighting and in some cases magic, but this many gold bokoblins would almost certainly lead to injuries Wild would do anything to avoid seeing on his friends. Including bringing out a certain mask. 

They could just go around, but they didn’t want to leave these monsters to harass innocent Hylians traveling the woods.

‘You guys wait here for now. I’ll infiltrate and steal their weapons. When I strike the first one, we’ll kill them all. They’ll throw things though so watch out.’ Wild signed, thankful many in the group had gotten used to each other’s silent languages. 

‘Wild, not alone.’ Hyrule signed back, hands eagerly sparking.

‘Trust me. It won’t be violent. I won’t even swing a sword.’ Wild’s smirk was recognized by many. The fire in his eyes often meant there would be fire to match in the fields of his Hyrule. As much as they worried what in Hylia’s name his plan was, the group all trusted him… and were eager to see what he would do this time.

‘First strike, understood.’ Time confirmed. He had learned long ago that many of the rules he knew about monsters, people, and nature in general were broken and warped in Wild’s Hyrule. Wild could make things fly across a forest, create strong upward breezes with fire and monsters used each other as clubs, (Wild told Time he wished he could have captured their faces on his slate the moment they witnessed that). Wild knew his Hyrule best, and Time had learned to trust that.

Wild nodded, that smirk still twitching up on his scarred face. With a flash from his slate, Wild had a mask, if you could even call it that, resembling the orange version of the monster in front of them. It was patched, worn, and very obviously hand made, most likely by one of the many odd merchants Wild had in his Hyrule. Four snorted, causing Sky to shush him. The rest of the boys looked like they were struggling not to laugh at the odd thing placed on their friend’s head.

‘You expect that work?’ Legend signed with a large smirk. Oh, he couldn’t wait to see this! Wild just winked and emerged from the bushes they were hiding behind. The rest of the group placed their hands on their weapons, prepared to step in should whatever Wild was planning not work. 

Instantly Wild widened his stance, moving side to side in the awkward way he had learned from the monsters scattered across Hyrule. Instantly Wild molded his body into the almost perfect portrayal of a Bokoblin. He heard gasps and surprised giggles behind him. Not wanting to give away their position, Wild turned slightly in order to see the group out of his peripherals. The best he could out of his mask anyway. 

Time was the first one he noticed. The Old Man’s face usually had a calm demeanor, worn from battle, but mischief still shining through. Now he just looked shocked, eye widened. Hylia, Wild just looked so wrong. 

“What the fuck what the fuck what the fuck?” Warriors muttered rapidly in almost perfect harmony with Wind. This was honestly quite disturbing. It was as if a man and a monster had simply been shoved together. Watching Wild lumber around surrounded by the monsters he was imitating awoke a part of their brain that wanted to look away immediately, yet they were transfixed. He knew it was Wild and it wasn’t that convincing. Why was it so fucking weird? They didn’t hear anything from Sky, but they both swore they could see his mouth murmuring obscenities at the pure chaos that was happening before his eyes. 

Four was struggling not to laugh. He didn’t want to give them away, it was just so damn funny watching Wild walk around like that. Twilight also looked like he was struggling not to laugh. Both their faces were red with laughter they were trying desperately to hide. It was so disturbing but so fucking hilarious. 

Legend’s face was almost as red as his tunic, probably from embarrassment of his teasing towards Wild. Why hadn’t he learned to not doubt that damn kid? Who knew what he had up his sleeve? Hyrule just looked on in awe. Maybe he could trade some magic lessons for some lessons in how to do that, whatever the hell it was. Wild might not be able to even do magic, but Hyrule was willing to try. Besides he should have tried to teach Wild magic long ago. What if he got ahold of some kind of flame or electric magic? And if Hyrule could blend in as a monster, Hyrule and Wild would be unstoppable! Hyrule started plotting with pure glee. 

The Bokoblins did a little hop towards their friend, sniffing him with their large noses. Wild copied their movements almost perfectly, tilting his head at the exact same angle. After doing their weird form of greeting, Wild began collecting weapons from around their camp. The Bokoblins were still surrounding him in suspicion, but they had no qualms with Wild taking their weapons and shields, along with all their food. The group rolled their eyes at that. 

Wild looked back at them, and although he didn’t let his eyes stay on them for long, they could see the pure mirth on his face. He was plotting again. Without warning, Wild pulled some meat from where it was cooking on the monster’s fire, before taking half of it in his mouth, eating it like a rabid bear. His fellow bokoblins cheered with their odd little voices and followed suit, scarfing down the meat in the same manner.

“Please stop please stop please stop.” Sky was murmuring. 

“Time! Make him stop!” Wind cried out, Warriors covering his mouth before the monsters heard. Four and Twilight simply coping by laughing into their hands harder, trying desperately to keep it contained. Wild’s teeth were dripping with the still cooking animal’s blood. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to make the entire scene all the more horrifying. Wild smirked at them, especially Legend. He didn’t quite understand why his acting was so atrocious to them, but that’s what they got for doubting him. 

Wild continued to lower their guards. Whenever he was bored by pretending to be a monster, he would make up voices for them in his head. Most of the time they were the posh voices he remembered hearing at fancy dinners he had to attend with Zelda as her knight. Once they had grown closer, Wild had a fond memory of the both of them mimicking the especially snotty ones with emotionless faces and mouths barely moving, saving their laughter for when they were away from the king. 

Finally Wild deemed them trusting enough to strike. Normally he would simply wait until they were asleep, but it was only early evening. They would be here for hours. Wild made his way around the fire, making his way to one of the back ones to prevent the others from being upon him immediately. In the blink of an eye he pulled his weapon from his slate and struck one of the golden Bokoblins in the back. 

The group snapped out of their stupor with the scream of the monster Wild had struck down, grabbing their weapons and pouncing upon the rest of them. They were tough opponents, Wild was right about that, but without weapons they didn’t stand a chance. With the entire group slashing away, they left with only a few minor bruises from flying rocks. No one would look Wild in the eyes however, he still had that Hylia forsaken mask on. 

“Hey Wild?”

“Yeah?”

“What the fuck was that?”

**Author's Note:**

> I have some outtakes of some of my stories, one now being Hyrule and Wild causing havoc the morning after this happens. I don't feel confident posting it yet, as it is very badly written, but perhaps after some editing.


End file.
